My lots of things

well, yet my brain refuse to sleep again....

i tell you what?, hahaha im freakishly tired...doing nothing on bed is making me thinking a lot of things....VERY MUCH A LOT~~~

Im not gonna put it here, okay maybe a few things....lol....but my brain is weary again...it even makes this optimistic part of go boo~huu....well i never fail to smile of-course...but still i got my "episodes" lol

i know very well where does this insomnia started and how it grows...

i dont wanna be drug dependable, just like i said to any people who suggest drugs to me...pasal the more i depend on it the harder i will fall asleep with or without drugs....i know its frustrating trying to get your hands on something to make you sleep...

owh ever so recently,

im impress and annoyed at the same time how people would suggest me to go with my own best friends to be my bf...im implying to both Hanis and Illham btw... sure i look great with Hanis or how I have the perfect chemistry with Illham but still.... its like mashing up casserole with mash potatoes.... you wouldn't like it....lol

first is illham, how would i be with him? hahaha, the idea is just ridiculous...he's here and there mcm biscuit....seriously his gf pun sangal hahaha....and and why am i so in a perfect chemistry with him is because, get this.....we've been friends since like forever...

then Hanis, well hanis is just complicated sometimes....and im just his mere sidekick hehe helping him here and there....nothing more then that....

so under any circumstances i wouldn't go out with both guys, they're like registered as a friend dah...

lol, thats the thing....anyone can be my the very best best friends....i have to admit, i adapt to people who im with, i shush when the person like me to shush, i laugh when i sense that someone is trying to make a joke, or i just go with my own friendly way to touch them....

mind you, i have so much best friends at the moment, haha sometimes its just overwhelming....teehee....but im okay with it.....i trust them more i trust anyone...they dont keep me lonely jua at times...haha

now im gone all mellow....sigh hahah

alright

im gonna try to sleep again......

My need for sleep

So here's my problem lately,

my insomnia is back, and its showing in a different color now, as in not normal....hahaha

so here's what happen, few days before miri, which was on the 9th. I'm have a good way to fall asleep, as in very good way...i just dozed off in front of a TV, which i barely do when a tv is open. Surprisingly the next day i woke up and find myself waking up around 7.15 ish....

I thought it was okay at first but the next night i went overboard with my games (i played the sims 3 lol) and slept around 2 am....then again i woke up around 7.30...just like that....i was tired but having a hard time falling asleep again...so i just woke up....

then the day where i went to miri, the night before, i slept late pasal i couldn't sleep...then around 12 i hit the sack....the next day, i woke up at 7.00am SHARP....

i was cranky, i meant very cranky but happy pasal shopping....

after miri....i was super tired....but i slept around 2pm....

next day woke up around 7.45....

imagine how cranky i was....i was like huff huff here sigh sigh there....

until today morning i woke up around 7.30...and my dad ask me why am i waking up at this hour...lol....i answered him honestly...then he wanted to bring me to tmpt org beurut....lol which i joke about the guy who will be massaging me a so-called "bomoh" lol...ngalih2 nya pun kana marah jua....

so just got home around 9...after the urut2 haha...but i couldn't sleep....is it possible if that person make it worse....

my brain is starting to fried dah....

and this prove, i dont need stress to activate my insomnia part of me....it just does.....

owh and this morning when i was waiting for my mum from the hospital guess what? hahaha someone ask for my number, and its a dude....lol....its very sweet and very brave of him to come straight to me asking for it tho, well i gave it to him of-course, he may not be keanu reeves but hey gotta gave credit for his effort right?....

My midnight coffee buzz

Okay another week has started....

and its nearly the second day of it....

and i can't sleep...

why you asked?

it's because this stupid twinky drank coffee for no apparent reason...lol

i had the busiest week ever so far, for this year i think...lol....

im still holding on a grudge against the prediction for my Chinese zodiac "Dragon" being unlucky the whole year...ahaha...but still im healthy as a cow....that all that is matter now....

so, here am i, doing absolutely nothing after doing something that is (V.games, chatting, novels and craps)...so here i am reading blogs and whatnot...im freakishly bored...

strangely, i encountered alot of blogs (on my link list or not) that people are coping with difficulties on their relationship...

well being the good person i am, lol, i tackle some of them...chatting saja...

half-way trough it all, i notice that i am single, lol and wondering if i should give people advice when's mine is all crappy and sappy....lol....

i ask my dear old friend, Illham about it...he says one thing "If you're there to help, you're a good person. If they (the one you helped) mention about your crappy sappy relationship, then they're the bad person"...see i'm all blur by the simplest thing sometimes...

im listening to Lady Antebellum's Need you now song...its all mellow...but what the heck...

well, the song makes sense when i was with that certain someone...well the one i call my own brian kinney if you must know...lol...

well, we're okay with each other at the moment...just being friends...funny how things turn back to normal even after the relationship phase...i mean normal as in being ok but still awkward at times... mind you guys, i do still keep my distance from him...

well im sleepy but hyper....lol...my brain is like going blank now...udah atu memblog ahhh...

some other time then

My writing

I knw i havent constantly blogging now days.....

lol

im keeping myself busy with chores and exercising...keeping myself not to bored....

i like sweating now.....i destroy 2 sports shoes dah....(which isnt mine of-course)...lol better me using them than never kan? lol.....

mum compliment me about being the "healthiest person in the family" lol and she brought a treadmill to encourage everyone to exercise....and she wants the every each of us to spend 5 mins on it....everyday...lol....i dont mind.....i love that i sweat alot....lol

been to the swimming pool alot jua....lol....dad encourage me to take the swimming lesson pasal i couldn't float very well....lol....but i told him sooner or later i'll float properly lol....

i'vebeen moving around jua lately....seeing a few peopel still single....then doing chores....lol mum says im ok with me being jobless as long as i done the chores perfectly and i'll earn my allowance ok....lol

so thats it so far....